There’s a certain magic to a Southern California sunset, especially when viewed from the beach. As someone who grew up in the Midwest, moving here for my doctoral work and to practice as a clinical psychologist opened my eyes to this simple, profound beauty. Watching the sun dip lower and lower, painting the sky in fiery hues before finally winking out below the horizon – it’s a truly magnificent experience, one that feels like it nourishes something deep within.
Early in my private practice, I thought this experience held universal power. I started assigning my clients, many wrestling with life’s challenges, a simple task: go to the beach and watch the sunset. It seemed like such a straightforward prescription for soul-feeding, a moment of natural wonder to counteract stress and anxiety.
But here’s what surprised me over the years: many found it incredibly difficult to do. It wasn’t usually a lack of time in the absolute sense. These same clients might readily dedicate an entire weekend to a whirlwind trip to Las Vegas – the undisputed capital of entertainment – immersing themselves in its thrills, excitement, gambling, and nightlife. They’d return with stories, certainly, but often feeling depleted rather than nourished, perhaps nursing a hangover and lighter wallets, their souls no richer for the experience. Yet, the simple, free act of watching a sunset, something potentially restorative, remained undone.
I don’t say this to criticize. Instead, it sparked a deep curiosity and, eventually, a better understanding of why we often gravitate towards fleeting entertainment while neglecting the very things that truly feed our souls. It’s a phenomenon I call the “Entertainment Trap.”
What’s Entertainment, Anyway?
When I talk about entertainment, I mean activities primarily designed for pleasure, distraction, or escapism. Think about common examples: binge-watching reality TV shows (like the OC Housewives, perhaps?), scrolling endlessly through social media feeds, getting lost in video games, or even the high-octane buzz of a place like Vegas. These activities can certainly be enjoyable in the moment. They offer a break, a laugh, a thrill.
But let’s be honest: after an hour or two of passive consumption or manufactured excitement, do we feel genuinely better inside? Does it contribute to our sense of meaning, purpose, or connection? Often, the answer is no. It might entertain us, but it doesn’t necessarily nourish us on a deeper level. Sometimes, it can even leave us feeling vaguely empty or dissatisfied.
And What Does it Mean to Feed Your Soul?
“Soul food,” on the other hand, encompasses activities that cultivate meaning, purpose, growth, and genuine connection in our lives. These are the things that resonate deeply, leaving us feeling more whole, centered, and truly alive after we engage in them.
What might this look like?
Meaning and Purpose: Volunteering for a cause you believe in, engaging in spiritual practices like prayer or meditation, pursuing creative expression through art, music, or writing, or having deep, meaningful conversations.
Personal Growth: Actively learning something new, engaging in self-reflection, consciously facing and overcoming challenges, or spending restorative time in nature.
Connection and Love: Intentionally building and nurturing relationships, spending quality time with loved ones, performing acts of service for others.
The key differentiator is the lasting internal state. After engaging in soul-feeding activities, we typically feel better – not just momentarily distracted, but genuinely uplifted, more peaceful, or more connected in our hearts.
The Lure of the Entertainment Trap
So, why is the allure of entertainment often stronger than the call of our soul? There are several potent reasons:
The Illusion of Fulfillment: Entertainment provides immediate gratification and a temporary sense of satisfaction. It feels good in the moment, creating the illusion that we’re filling a void. However, this feeling is often superficial and fleeting, leaving us wanting more soon after.
The Dopamine Rush: Modern entertainment is expertly designed to trigger our brain’s reward system, releasing dopamine, the “feel-good” neurotransmitter. This creates a pleasurable sensation that our brains naturally want to repeat. Over time, this can lead to addictive-like behaviors where we constantly seek the next hit of entertainment, much like someone chasing a high. While not as intense as substance addiction, the underlying mechanism is similar – the natural, quieter joys of life (like a sunset) can pale in comparison to the engineered dopamine spikes of entertainment, making it harder to find satisfaction in simpler things.
The Time Cost: How often have you fallen down a YouTube rabbit hole, emerged from a hours-long gaming session, or finished a streaming binge, only to realize that significant time has passed with little to show for it? This is a major cost of the entertainment trap – it consumes the precious time and energy that could be invested in activities that offer lasting benefits.
Expert Engineering: Let’s face it, the entertainment industry, from social media platforms to casinos, has become incredibly adept at hooking us and keeping us engaged. Their business models often rely on maximizing our time and attention. Think about Las Vegas again: casinos famously offer free drinks to gamblers. Why? Because they know that lowered inhibitions and the pleasant buzz make people more likely to keep playing, keep spending. It’s a calculated strategy to keep you locked in the entertainment cycle.
I once walked through a local casino late on a Thursday night, purely out of curiosity. Who is here on a weeknight? I wasn’t gambling or drinking, just observing. The striking thing was the lack of joy on people’s faces. Despite being surrounded by flashing lights, noise, and the promise of excitement, I didn’t see smiles or hear laughter. It felt less like a place of fun and more like one of quiet desperation. It left me feeling sad, wishing those individuals could find peace and connection elsewhere, perhaps at home with loved ones, rather than seeking solace at a slot machine.
Cultivating Your Own Soul Food Menu
Escaping the entertainment trap requires conscious effort and a commitment to discovering and prioritizing what truly nourishes your soul. It’s about shifting focus from external distractions to internal sources of fulfillment.
How do you find your soul food?
Listen to Your Heart: Pay attention to what genuinely resonates with you. What activities leave you feeling energized, peaceful, inspired, or deeply content afterward?
Experiment: Try different things. Maybe it’s meditation, spending time in nature (even if it’s just sitting outside with a cup of tea), visiting an art museum (a personal favorite of mine!), deep conversations with friends, engaging in a creative hobby, or volunteering.
Notice the Afterglow: The key is the lasting effect. Does the activity leave you feeling depleted or enriched? Does it align with your values and sense of purpose?
Embrace Individuality: What feeds one person’s soul might not feed another’s. Some people dislike the beach (sand, wind); others aren’t keen on nature (bugs!). That’s okay. The journey is personal. Find what works for you. There truly are infinite possibilities.
Making Soul Food a Daily Staple
True nourishment isn’t about occasional feasts; it’s about consistent, daily sustenance. Planning a soulful retreat once a year is wonderful, but it won’t sustain you through the daily grind. We need to integrate soul-feeding practices into our everyday lives.
For me, this means meditating twice a day – once upon waking and once before bed. It’s a practice I’ve maintained for decades because it consistently centers me and nourishes my soul. Find small, manageable practices you can incorporate daily or several times a week. It could be journaling, a short walk in nature, listening to uplifting music, expressing gratitude, or connecting meaningfully with a loved one.
The Rewards of a Soul-Centered Life
Making the conscious choice to prioritize soul food over constant entertainment isn’t always easy. The pull of distraction is strong, and the entertainment world is skilled at keeping us hooked. It requires discipline, self-awareness, and prioritizing your well-being. You might even experience “withdrawal” symptoms initially as you reduce reliance on entertainment’s dopamine hits.
However, the rewards are profound:
Greater happiness and life satisfaction.
Stronger, more meaningful relationships.
A deeper sense of purpose and meaning.
Increased resilience in facing life’s challenges.
A life that feels authentically soul-centered.
Surrounding yourself with supportive people who are also on this path can make a huge difference. But ultimately, the journey begins with introspection and a commitment to listening to what truly makes your heart feel full.
It takes work, yes. Perhaps this is some of the hardest work we can do, given the addictive nature of our entertainment culture. But when you start consistently choosing activities that nourish your soul, you’ll begin to wake up each morning and go to sleep each night with a sense of gratitude, feeling that each day is a meaningful part of your beautiful journey through life. You’ll find yourself saying, “Thank you,” not just for the big moments, but for the quiet, fulfilling substance of a life lived with intention and soul.
